*Chad Jarnagin

Separation from definitions is most unlikely in life. Most would say that everything is either black or white. I’m not talking about color, or race. The grey areas can be a little taboo. We tend to gravitate towards big “hot button” issues, but that is not what we’re talking about here really. It seems as though we do our best to set up borders & rules to protect our way of faith, but what we’re possibly doing is robbing our lives a full dimensioned journey.

I’m finding that life can’t always be black and white, cut and dry. As much as we would like for it to be, sometime it just isn’t. What if God doesn’t want us to live in a black and white world? A black and white world is created by man. The Creator breathed color into life. WE define the black and white. We may use our moral code and what we have learned from the scriptures to form it, but it is still our formation. If we are setting up the black and white perimeters, what do we need God for? If we are depending on our own, accepted definitions of right and wrong, we have no need of God and His grace. Scripture says that hope in what is seen, is not real hope (Rom. 8:24). Lines might need to be blurred in order for us to actually see God clearly. Does God live in the grey area? The uncertain area? He is bigger than our boundaries and definitions. He is most definately larger than our words and intellect.

“The choice in politics isn’t usually between black and white. It’s between two horrible shades of gray.” – Thorneycroft

“Shades of grey wherever I go. The more I find out the less that I know. Black and white is how it should be. But shades of grey are the colors I see.” – Billy Joel

“Light is meaningful only in relation to darkness, and truth presupposes error. It is these mingled opposites which people our life, which make it pungent, intoxicating. We only exist in terms of this conflict, in the zone where black and white clash.” – Louis Aragon

“When you’re the victim of the behavior, it’s black and white; when you’re the perpetrator, there are a million shades of gray.” – Laura Schlessinger

Schlessinger’s quote makes me think “Why shouldn’t we want to see life in a million shades of gray”, (or vibrant color for that matter)?

So much of the Christian sub-culture can preach that if you have a checklist of things TO DO, and then one for the things to NOT DO, we can live safe, happy, good Christian lives. Throw a little money in the plate, bag, or basket PLUS no smoking PLUS no cussing EQUALS good Christian. Doing what I have heard and been told to do PLUS asking no questions EQUALS good Christian.

I haven’t seen many big life changing things happen in safe controlled, calculated environments. I believe that “magic” happens in the uncontrolled, unexplained place of faith and mystery.

Idol-
1. an image or other material object representing a deity to which religious worship is addressed.
2. Bible.
a. an image of a deity other than God.
b. the deity itself.
3. any person or thing regarded with blind admiration, adoration, or devotion.
4. a mere image or semblance of something, visible but without substance, as a phantom.
5. a figment of the mind; fantasy.
6. a false conception or notion; fallacy.

Lately I have identified a few unlikely idols in my life.

The pursuit of perfection, control, acknowledgment, & knowledge.

I find myself frustrated & irritated when whatever I’m involved w/ or around aren’t as perfect as they could be.

The pursuit of control will forever elude everyone of us in some degree, but that doesn’t stop me from thirsting for the very illusion of it. I find that it’s like a hand full of sand. You can control it for a while & even manipulate it by adding water, but it will eventually slip thru your hands.

Acknowledgment can be a beautiful thing, but it has a tendency to taint our motives; Playing our political cards just right to get the most of a moment in the spotlight. I’ve even had to take time away from Twitter, Facebook, & other forms of media b/c of the onslot of self-promotion, the who’s who clubs, & everyone in their mom writing a book or recording an album. I’m actually in the long process of doing both. My gut check is not in the inspiration and opportunity for these things, it’s more about the motive. My motives struggle w/ comparing the acknowledgment that others are receiving, I could be receiving as well.

Knowledge. All the education on the planet is no substitute for wisdom. I love to read, listen, & learn. There is nothing wrong in that until there is a lust for knowledge. I have to confess that on occasion that’s what I believe happens.

Maybe the urge for control has something to do w/ all the the above. So, Father, I’m trying to trust You for who You are. Thank you for loving me for who I am and not who I should be.

Not long ago, one of my updates on Twitter said “cynicism is tiring. i’m going to try to talk less, listen more; fear less, hope more; do less, rest more; whine less, breathe more.” That’s where I am right now, I’m for tuning in.

Following Jesus & worshiping our Father is obviously not centered around us as humans, but we cannot overlook how we were made / wired. Not tending to issues that are possibly laying dormant under the surface of our lives, is more detrimental to our faith journeys than we sometimes realize.

Matthew 22:37-40 (MSG) Jesus said, “‘Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence.’ This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: ‘Love others as well as you love yourself.’ These two commands are pegs; everything in God’s Law and the Prophets hangs from them.”

Self-hatred, as well as pride, are two of the biggest obstacles to true worship of our Creator. They distort the true image of God. We were made in our Creator’s image. When was the last time you let yourself be loved for who you are, and not for who you should be?

“If you want to benefit from [worship], I suggest that you allow yourself to be loved…as you are, and not as you should be. Christianity does not exist in what we do for God, but what God does for us. It always starts with what God does for us. All He asks is that you be astonished at the fact that He bothered at all”. – Brennan Manning.

How effective can we be at loving each other, like we love ourselves, if we don’t truly allow ourselves to be loved?
Read this passage from Psalm 139, and let this sink in. “Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother’s womb. I thank you, High God—you’re breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! 
I worship in adoration—what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, the days of my life all prepared before I’d even lived one day.”

“A glimpse of God will save you. To gaze at Him will sanctify you.” -Manley Beasley. Our personal, relational, and spiritual evolution will move us more and more towards Jesus as we pursue truth (John 4:23) and surrender our control to the One in ultimate control. By resolving to allow ourselves to be loved as we are, we will change.

I believe that being at peace w/ who we are and how we were made (in the image of God), will define how we live and how we treat each other. Ultimately, it will help define the mark that we leave on our society, family legacy, and communities. Godspeed on your journey.

I am a believer in the power of words. Be it a poetic approach or simply an informative angle. Within my world, words can inspire, confuse, or even distract.

Our verbiage is important. It even helps communicate what we’re not saying. The language that a group of people use often describes that tribe of people. It can express how they dress, the kind of music they listen to, and what they believe.

Here’s an example- In “churchy” circles I’ve begun to hear the terms “churched” and “unchurched”. I understand both sub-cultured terms, but both make me a little unsettled to be honest. What about this perspective? By “churched”, we’re implying that once you are in church (go to church, join a church, yada yada), that we are in the “club”. By using the term “unchurched”, it implies that one is outside of the church (people that don’t attend church on a regular basis).

To me, “churched” means that one is programmed to get the lingo, know the secret handshake, and understand the churchy verbiage. Where “unchurched” can mean that “they” don’t get the lingo, don’t know all the right things to say or do. Kind of makes me want to be an “unchurched” follower of Jesus to be honest.

A few months back, my church decided to change up a little verbiage. We are no longer using the term “member or membership”, and are using “partner or partnership” to describe the people that join us in a covenant fellowship. Personally, I think it was a good move, as we are striving to be aware of our words are not saying.

I will admit that I get hung up on verbiage & the words people use, all-the-while others don’t give it a second thought. You might be thinking “dude, get over it, you know what they mean”. I would say, why NOT change how we speak. Sometimes things unbroken should be broken. They might have more character. Challenging the status quo cultivates growth.

So, may we think, process with an authentic filter, and sense the manner in which we speak, print, publish, and post. What are we not saying?

Random Musings of a Worship Leader

Lately I have found myself dreaming, reforming, and struggling to “keep it real”. As many of us do, I find myself chasing trends instead of God’s heart. How can I be so arrogant to say I know what God’s heart is? The Holy Spirit is how. Honestly, sometimes I lament the fact that I find myself so extremely busy. With the email, phone, texts, feeds dinging / ringing, the noise can drown out the “still small voice”. There’s NO WAY I’m complaining… The reason I do what I do is b/c I’m in love w/ the One who has called me.

In “The Shattered Lantern”, Rolheiser suggests that, “The way back to a lively faith is not a question of finding the right answers, but living in a certain way. The existence of God, like the air we breathe, need not be proven. It is a question of developing good lungs to meet it correctly.” One of my new favorite people, Ian Cron, writes in “Chasing Francis” words that are igniting my spirit in ways I know has God smiling. It’s amazing how God uses all of our lives to affect each other… if we take the time to read, listen, and stop all the hustle & hurry.

The thought of people of all ages across the planet also finding themselves constantly evolving and chasing the Way on the journey is refreshing. It really is about the process, and not just the promise of a destination.

“Reverence and relevance are not at war w/ each other”… Ed Stetzer has a great post on some of these thoughts HERE. This post helps address a topic that comes up in conversations as well as my own opinions, musings, and struggles.

As a lead worshiper, father, husband, pastor, and songwriter, I tend to contemplate often. A couple of nights ago on Twitter I posted a little thought that I had as I sat quietly watching the World Series (I don’t like the Yankees, btw)… Maybe we don’t like the silence b/c we are afraid of what we will hear.

If all we focus on and all that we hear are others opinions, comments, trends, and preferences, we’ll never be centered beings. We’ll always be trying to jump higher, run faster, and perform for the masses. Instead, there is the sometimes elusive audience of One that should be our desire, and goal. Elusive from our perspective, not His. In Him we trust.